Without the amazing and wonderful talents of Phil Hartman, many of Springfield's most delightful and hilarious characters would never have existed. Two of the best being Troy Maclure and Lionel Hutz. One of the funniest men ever to come out of Saturday Night Live, Phil was truly a comedic legend. He will be sorely missed. This page is dedicated to his honor, and his memory.
Troy: Welcome to the Knowledgeum. I'm Troy MaClure. You may remember me from such automated information kiosks as "Welcome to Springfield Airport" and "Where's Nordstrom". While you are enjoying our hall of wonders, your car will unfortunately be subject to repeated break-ins.
Homer: What'd he say? What about my car? (127 K)
Troy: Hello, I'm actor Troy MaClure. You kids might remember me from such educational films as "Lead Paint: Delicious but Deadly!" and "Here Comes the Metric System". (40 K)
Troy: Hi, I'm Troy MaClure. You may remember me from such nature films as "Earwigs - Ewww!" and "Man Vs. Nature: The Road to Victory". (77 K)
Troy: Oh, hi! I'm Troy MaClure. You might remember me from such self-help videos as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Confident, Stupid". (122 K)
Troy: We're gathered to morn the passing of Herschel Schmoikel Krustofsky, beloved entertainer and dear freind. Hello, I'm Troy MaClure! You might remember me from such show business funerals as "Andre the Giant, We Hardly Knew Ye" and "Shemp Howard: Today, We Morn a Stooge". (129 K)
Troy: As I said to Delores Montenegro in "Calling all Quakers": Have it your way, baby! (48 K)
Troy: I'm Troy Maclure, and I'll leave you with what we all came here to see - Hardcore Nudity! (61 K)
Troy: Here's an apealing fellow. In fact, they're a peeling him off the sidewalk!
Homer: Heh heh heh. It's funny, cause I don't know him. (108 K)
Troy: Eggs, precious eggs. If they're to survive, they require the gentle warmth and tender love that only a mother can provide. Or better yet, a 75 watt bulb. (80 K)
Troy: I'm Troy MaClure. You might remember me from such films as "Today We Kill, Tomorrow We Die" and "Gladys, the Groovy Mule". (40 K)
Hutz: Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my suit agains the film "The Neverending Story". (60 K)
Hutz: Uh oh, we've drawn Judge Sneider.
Marge: Is that bad?
Hutz: Well, he's had it in for me ever since I...kinda ran over his dog.
Marge: You did?
Hutz: Well, replace the word "kinda" with the word "repeatedly" and the word "dog" with "son". (166 K)
Legal Disclaimer: I make no claim to any Copyrighted materials found on this page. If you find copyrighted material here, I don't know how it got there. Probably hackers put them there. This page is not about the Copyrighted television show "The Simpsons", owned by Fox. It is about making lovely floral arrangements. If you find Simpsons information here, again, I blame evil, evil hackers.